Finding Freedom and Closure in Ritual

I’m taking responsibility for my actions.  And I’m finding freedom.  As I wind up my time as pastor of Hanover Missionary Church I’m learning to let go of things I wish I could change, but can’t.  Easier said than done.

It’s happening through ritual.  It may sound strange but I’ve started planning moments that link an action with reflection.  Here’s an example: on Monday I set fire to some papers in our fire pit.  This may sound like a normal burning procedure but it wasn’t.  Monday’s fire was special.  It was a ritual.  The paper represented something.  And before I lit the match I listened to a reading about ‘letting go’.  Then, I sat. And I reflected.  Quietly.  And as I lit the match and held the burning matchstick next to the paper until it caught.  I felt sad.  But I also felt loosened.  Looser.  Not a loser.  Freer.  And since that moment, the heart-attachment that those papers represented was severed.  I was set free from the burden of expectation that those papers held over me.

Ritual is why funerals are important.  Funerals are rituals that allow people to have one last moment with friends and family to celebrate the life and grieve the loss of their significant someone.  It’s a way of taking control of our response to death–something we have no control over.  To participate in a ritual, such as a funeral or memorial, is to deliberately enter into a moment to reflect, grieve, and, ultimately, let go.  It’s one of the first steps in the ‘new county’ of life without the one who has died.  And after the funeral is over, grief doesn’t necessarily subside, but closure begins.

So, as I bring closure to my time at HMC I’m embracing ritual and finding freedom to move forward into the great unknown.